Panel of CEO geniuses spent $10 million on a national logo that looks like a golden coronavirus

Australia has unveiled a new logo to stand alongside the iconic “Australian made” kangaroo. The problem: the overwhelming impression is of a golden COVID-19.

The “TV Week Golden Ronie” took two years to develop, was approved by a council of some of the nation’s richest and most influential CEOs, and somehow cost $10 million.

Really, at this present moment in time, it could only be worse if it resembled a police officer committing a racist murder.

Let’s have another look at it, because fucking hell.

And the virus.

It’s meant to be a wattle by the way.

Former Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull gave the task of the new logo to Australia’s Nation Brand Advisory Council, a group headed up by mining billionaire Andrew “Twiggy” Forrest.

Because whenever we need something done in Australia we ask mining CEOs.

Other brain geniuses on the Council include Qantas chief executive Alan Joyce, Atlassian co-founder Mike Cannon-Brookes, Vogue Australia editor-in-chief Edwina McCann, chairman of Coopers Brewery Glenn Cooper AM, and CEO of Aesop Michael O’Keefe. A skincare products brand.

The Council’s mission statement says: “Australia’s Nation Brand will harmonise what the world sees, hears, knows and experiences of Australia, making everything Australian easily recognisable.”

I’m sorry I vomited in my mouth just a little there.

Admittedly the logo was approved before the global pandemic began. But the fact it hasn’t been scrapped already – that we heard about it at all – is a bit of an indictment on the decision making abilities of everyone involved.

I know a guy I used to make magazines with that could have whipped a kickass logo, possibly with a snowboarder doing a rad flip, for a few hundred bucks.

My stoner metal band’s album cover, which is also sick, cost a few hundred bucks.

Anyway, don’t ever feel imposter syndrome again.